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May 01, 2003
Volume II, Issue 9
 
Fringe Clippings
 
P.E. class with "class"
 
Golf is being brought into school with the help of Golf 20/20. Golf 20/20 is an industry-backed initiative aimed at increasing participation in the game. Golf 20/20 plans to implement its new golf teaching program in 80-100 elementary schools nationwide. Funding will be split between the school districts and Golf 20/20.
 
All wound down
 
Golf giant Acushnet — owners of the Titleist, Footjoy, Cobra and Pinnacle brands — is about to be streamlined again. The industry juggernaut recently announced it will be laying off close to 200 people over the next year and no less than 85 by June. This announcement comes on the heels of 290 layoffs just last year for Acushnet. Additionally, they will be closing down Ball Plant I, which is located in the actual town of Acushnet, Massachusetts.
 
I'll take it!
 
Orlimar Golf is having a serious identity crisis. Once considered the hottest company in golf, the equipment manufacturing company now is unsure of its actual ownership situation. The company chairman, Jesse Ortiz resigned along with the company's board of directors. Orlimar has substantial loans still outstanding with LaSalle Bank of Chicago, but the bank does not claim ownership of the company. Stay tuned for more on this story...
 
Should have known better
 
In a lawsuit filed on April 14, Nicklaus Golf Equipment is asking that Wilson Sporting Goods stop production and recall all of its new line of golf balls called "JACK". Nicklaus Equipment has the right to the trademark "JACK". Nicklaus Golf Equipment is accusing Wilson of trying to cash in on Jack's name with out compensation or contract. Wilson Sporting Goods had no comment on the matter.
 
 
Paralysis by Analysis
 
Hey, just stay cool...
 
Save for a few of you — Northeasterners and Grunge Land Natives — the weather is heating up outside. Not to mention that daylight savings time is now upon us, and we all know what that means. (Yeah dinner's cold, but you better compliment the cook anyway). As the mercury rises, there are always a few extra considerations that must be taken to accomplish a gratifying 18 holes.

  1. Shorts are stylish too: Lose your pro-posing image with those long black slacks. You're not and never will be the Black Knight so save on your dry cleaning bill and start wearing some shorts on the course. That is unless your legs are whiter than an Al Gore hip-hop party.

  2. Antiperspirant deodorants: Typical shower in a can stuff is just intended to keep you dry and non-repulsive under normal conditions. 103 degrees Fahrenheit from the middle of a fairway bunker to get home in two for the win is not normal. The antiperspirant will also help to keep you dry when it matters most so that no one sees you sweat! Not to mention that white Ashworth you decided on wearing won't be unwearable next week.

  3. Cooler at 5:00: To remind you, it is daylight savings time (in most places that is). The sun is at its hottest at 1-2:30. Why tee off right then? If you can't play in the morning, then just hold back your ambitions for another couple hours. You can tee off at 3:30-4:00 and still get 'em all in. It is much cooler at that time of day, and you won't be fighting too many crowds at that time. Speaking of cooler...

  4. Switch to light beer: Yeah, yeah you're a man's man, and you want everyone to know. Forget the testosterone-induced proof of manhood crapola for one second, and make an intelligent decision. If you can't do without the sauce for 18 then just select something that will be easier on your system. Besides, a black and tan from a can just can't taste the same!

I am aware that this is not your normal hot weather advice, but then again OTF is not your normal publication. Try to keep things cooler than normal when you're on the course this coming summer, and you may just shoot some better scores. If not, always remember it's not our fault you can't break 90!

PS: Drinking water has been rumored for many years to maintain a cooler body temperature. We wouldn't know anything about this, but it can't hurt to try!
 
 
Reading the Line
 
What a great idea!
 
Just what is a major manufacturer like Wilson thinking (or not thinking) to assume that a moniker like "JACK" would not give cause for the Golden Bear to come out from his cave to protect what is his? In related news: Wilson is currently accepting resumes in the marketing department.
 
Hello Freddy, good to see ya again
 
Four rounds, all under 70, equals a win for Mr. Couples in last week's Shell Houston Open with 21-under. Fred Couples had no problem with Redstone GC, shooting his best 72-hole score in relation to par in his career. He rolled up a four-stroke victory over Mark Calcavecchia, Stuart Appleby and Hank Kuehne. This was Fred's first title since 1998.
 
Yeah, but...
 
It's a frightening scenario to think how well Fred Couples can play golf. A perennial crowd favorite with perhaps the smoothest all around game since Slammin' Sammy, Couples has long been regarded among the game's greatest talents. Unfulfilled potential, however, is a stigma that reluctant superstars must accept. So as most of you know, I fear not the overwhelming majority and their warm and fuzzy appreciation for such a nice guy. Even nice guys like Freddy did not get to the tour by being nice. He and several of his cohorts have become complacent. Complacency will eventually make the tour more appealing as the younger and stronger players begin to establish themselves and, more importantly, their will to win. Here's to hoping that the following statistic will not hold true for the rest of the year: nine out of ten of this year's winners on tour have previously won a tour event. What's more, only two of them are under 30! Yikes...
 
Standing corrected
 
The Fringe faithful have spoken in unison; and, with the exception of one innocent (nameless and faceless) fan, you all thought that CBS did a bang up job in televising the Masters Tournament. I am a man of pride, but majority does rule, and I cannot argue the masses. Not to mention the ratings. CBS garnered its third highest rating of Masters coverage ever! Congratulations must be awarded.

However, not without commentary, as you may have well expected. As I contributed to the masses that viewed the tournament on television, I am under voluntary sentence to stay tuned. Not to mention that I suspect those who would have changed the channel found it rather hard to accomplish from the comatose state they found themselves in. I kid because I care, of course. I could not agree more with most of you as a fan. The Tiger sabbatical was not totally unwelcome, but I do guarantee you that if money was being spent on commercials, we would have seen more of him.
 
Where's the gum?
 
In a move sure to stir flea market collector booths everywhere trading card giant Upper Deck announced that it was distributing the first subset of women golfer cards in history. Can you find the dollar bill in this commentary? Or is it just coincidence that Annika's big week is coming soon? No great mystery as to why Annika, Karrie and Natalie Guibis along with other marketable names will be featured in the set, but the blatant absence of Grace "So easy on the eyes" Park is quite disturbing to this fan.
 
 
 

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